not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
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