Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
This couple is walking their pig around campus
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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