there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
