That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
