I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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