I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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