i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
