Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
When are your genitals available?
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
