ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
