jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
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