He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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