in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
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