nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
