# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Randomize
