You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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