Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
There's even glitter on my cock...
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
