bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
