just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
