so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
