True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
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