make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
