dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Randomize
