I think I am morally bankrupt
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
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