Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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