maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize