The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
sex in a hospital.. check
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
