In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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