i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Randomize
