I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
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