i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Randomize
