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im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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