windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
