I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Randomize
