Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
