Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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