I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
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