if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize