Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
