Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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