i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
