So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
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