I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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