i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
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