New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
