I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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