either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
