Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Randomize