in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
