Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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