I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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